I wrote this really long post about how I was really fascinated with the science that is Socializing. Half way through I realized that the reason I started writing that post was because I was trying to understand how I socialize. I like to take a lot of time and dedicated it to just observing people. A lot of it though, does end in some serious self analysis. I usually come to one of many similar conclusions when I take the time to analyze my small circle of friends.

The friends that you choose are a reflection of self. 

These words constantly resonate within me. Lately I have been really about upsetting the balance of my own social circle. The reason I have taken this decision is to understand some of the people around me. Some people would call this a social experiment, but I have actually chosen to do this by merely being more vocal about what I agree and disagree upon. I have made few things vocal thus far because I am aware that these things must be done in moderation. I have begun with few things, such as suggesting that I truly am not bothered by being replaced. As a woman, I am often aware that women, in their competitive nature, have something against being replaced by other women in friendships and or relationships. We struggle with a small sense of inferiority that constantly reflects our true self, like a mirror almost. Another is in which, I have started to exclude myself from situations in which I no longer feel that my input resonates in a way that someone actually does something about the opinions or advice they ask for.

I, myself, have come to two or more impasses where I have been confronted with this situation and it has presented a conflict within me. Do my friends really reflect the parts of me that I value?

Im going to end this point here, in mid-meditation because I feel that there is more to explore at a later date.